8-year-old: Do grownups ever get bored?
Me: Sure. Why do you ask.
8-year-old: It seems like you never get bored.
Me: Really? How so?
8-year-old: Because you spend so much time doing boring things like typing on your computer and looking at papers and cleaning the house.
5-year-old: Sometimes you can be done even if you’re not finished.
Me: I know you’re talking about lunch, but that’s also a pretty healthy outlook when it comes to life and work.
8-year-old: Kids at school play this game called Infection where everyone is It. I don’t like it, because eventually I’m being chased by a wall of people, and some people lie and say they’re not It, and then tag you. And it seems like there’s no way to in.
Me: Very on-the-nose.
5-year-old: Rock, paper, scissors, shoot.
Me: Paper covers rock.
5: It’s not a rock. It’s a meteorite. Meteorite burns paper.
Me: Well, this isn’t just paper. It’s a scientific paper, and science can stop meteorites.
8-year-old: But what stops science?
Spouse: Fox News.
4-year-old: Would you be dead if a dinosaur ate you?
Me: Yes, you'd be dead if a dinosaur ate you.
4-year-old: No. Would you be dead if a dinosaur ate you?
Me: Yes, I would be. And you would be dead if a dinosaur ate you too.
4-year-old: I wasn't alive when there were dinosaurs.
Read MoreShe was supposed to be napping, but instead my 5-year-old decided to invent a “Coronavirus Vacuum” to suck the virus out of the air. It comes complete with “jelly donuts disguised as red blood cells to attract the virus and keep it trapped inside.”
Read More5-year-old: All the princesses and superheroes are going to Power School.
Me: What do they do in Power School?
5-year-old: Power Points.
Read More
